So I thought to myself “Hmm. I’ve got 3 episodes of Agents of Shield left to watch. If I watch them all, it will be tomorrow. I should occupy my time better”

So I thought to myself “Hmm. I could drink nice whisky at the same time”

So I set out on an Adventure.

The cupboard with the whisky is in the livingroom, which is also the bedroom (Because that way me and my partner both get to have our own rooms, and the balance of the universe is maintained) which has a large glass door leading to the Kitchen.

So:

> Look

You are in Aquarion’s Room. The lights are blue. There is a SOFA here. There a COMPUTER here. Exits lead EAST to the Corridor.

> Go EAST

The Corridor. Here there is a hat-rack, some discarded post, some less discarded bags. Exits lead EAST to Fyr’s room, SOUTH to the Living Room, NORTH to the Great Outdoors WEST to Aquarion’s Room and SOUTHWEST to places beyond the scope of this adventure.

> Go SOUTHWEST

No. There are wolves there.

> Go SOUTH

The Living Room. There is a CUPBOARD here. There is a BED here. There is ASLEEP here. There is DARKNESS here. Exits theoretically lead NORTH to the Corridor, or WEST to the Kitchen.

> Open Cupboard

It is too dark to be fooling around in a cupboard that has glass bottles in it.

> Locate Torch

There may be AMERICANS here.

> Locate Flashlight

There is a LANTERN in the Kitchen. Get your adventure terminology right, jackass.

> Go West

Life is peaceful there.

The Kitchen. It is dark. There are no lights on. The overhead lights would be bright, and disturb the ASLEEP in the East. Some genius has installed battery powered stick-on DOWNLIGHT above the Kettle and the Sink. The LANTERN is somewhere near the kettle, you think.

> Turn on the downlight above the kettle.

Quite a parser we have here.

There is an ALMIGHTY CRASH here. The downlight falls apart in your hands. BATTERIES litter the landscape.

You have a DOWNLIGHT

> Freeze

You are cold.

The crash was not as ALMIGHTY as you may have assumed. The ASLEEP is undisturbed.

> Pick up BATTERIES

The batteries are small, and the kitchen is dark. Any kind of light source would help.

>  Turn on the downlight above the sink.

Pale white light just about puts some highlights on the darkness in the rest of the kitchen.

>  Pick up BATTERIES

You have a BATTERIES

> Put BATTERIES in DOWNLIGHT

Fiat lux.

> Reattach DOWNLIGHT above kettle.

Lebetem illuminatur

You can see a LANTERN

> Take Lantern

You have a Lantern

> Turn on Lantern

The lantern is excited.

Its excitement lights up the room, dimly. You weren’t very effective, apparently.

> Go East

Life is less peaceful here.

The Living Room

> Open Cupboard

You open the cupboard. You can see some WHISKY, some WHISKEY, some BARELY WHISKY, some OH YES IT IS WHISKY, and a LOT OF OTHER ALCOHOL

> Pick up OH YES IT IS WHISKY

You have a BOTTLE OF WHISKY

> Go North

The Corridor

> Go WEST

Aquarion’s room

> Drink WHISKY

You forgot the glass.

> Bother.