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The Byron Report was released. It said “Video games are fine, unless played by people without a grip on reality”. Well, roughly. The reaction from the British press in support of this validation of a growing medium has been a joy to behold. I have replaced one word in this quote from The Times:

I hate [books], on or offline. I hate the way they suck real people into fake worlds and hold on to them for decades at a time. I hate being made to feel hateful for saying so, and I hate being told to immerse myself in them before passing judgment, because it feels like being told to immerse myself in smack and teenage pregnancy before passing judgment on them.

See, the important thing you should remember is that because I grew up playing video games like Valhalla), Monkey Island, Civilization), Dizzy, Worms and Grant Theft Auto, I am – I am sorry to say – Utterly devoted to the search for Big Whoop, but have so far been unable to get a Trieme over the ocean square between me and the next area. I think if I can get the oil can from the mine-shaft, I might be able to oil the car and stunt-jump my stolen car into the ring network and get the rocket-pack crate.

To Giles Whittell – who wrote the original article – I send one of the things that the move from the two dimensional games of my youth lacked from modern virtual worlds:


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