" 'Tis the goal of all housecats to become spherical." --RW "teG I sdrawkcaB eroM ehT oG I sdrawroF eroM ehT" "!sgub evah t'nseod CP sihT ?sgub naem ayaddahW" "" " "" " " "" (Random Quotes) ""Bother!"" said Pooh, as he hid the Death Star plans in his Hunny pot. ""Bother!"" said Pooh, as the sysop locked him out of the system. ""Maybe if we attack it, it will get confused, and make a mistake!" " to continue ->" ......... "'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it!" "'E's kicked the bucket! 'E's shuffled off 'is mortal coil!" "'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on!" "'Ello, I wish to register a complaint." - Monty Python "'Thief' is SO ugly. I prefer 'Creative Aquisition Specialist.'" "(A)bort, (R)etry, (G)et out the .45?" "(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (K)ick system" "(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with a large hammer." "(A)bort, (R)etry, (P)retend it didn't happen." "(A)bort, (R)etry, (P)roject thoughts of massive violence." "(A)bort, (R)etry, (S)mack the @#$&*~ thing!" "(A)bort, (R)etry, (S)mack the friggin thing" "++++++++", Said she addictively. "... terrible pain in all the diodes down my left hand side..." "...All the lonely people, where do they all come from?" - Beatles "...I have a bad habit of telling the truth..." - Kira "...I'm locked inside a chocolate factory...DON'T SEND HELP!" "...To seek out strange, new Taglines...To boldly quote..." "...a Ferengi is trying to sell us Windows, may I fire?" "...besides, it's clearly a bunny rabbit. "...old enough to know better;...too damned young to care!" "...only a test. Had this been an actual tagline..." "...to boldly go where no mallard has gone before!" - Darkwing Duck "...whenever he gets dirty, you can take him out and beat him..."-Zazu "11" - there's my two bits' worth." 140,000 rehydratable chickens?" * Rimmer "Check." * Lister "42? 7 1/2 million years and all you can come up with is 42?!" "42?!" 7.5 million years a- oh, you were running Windows." 640K should be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981 "A Long Walk" - by Miss DeBus "A fool sees not the same tree that a wise man sees." -- Blake "A fool uttereth all his mind." -- Proverbs 29:11 "A fool's bolt is soon shot." - Shakespeare "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds" R.W. Emerson "A mime is a terrible thing to waste...kill them slowly." -zf- "A random toss - the only true justice." - Two-Face" "Adults are obsolete children." (Dr. Seuss) Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy." "After we pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is no longer our friend." "Alas poor kiroY, I knew him backwards." "Alcohol was just poison to him." - Hemingway, on F. Scott Fitzgerald "Alcohol: The more you drink, the less you think!" - Dinosaur TV ad "All About Kissing" - by Miss L. Toe "All Alone" - by Saul E. Terry "All I said was, `That piece of halibut was good enough for Jehovah!' "All constants are variables." - Murphy's Law of Mathematics "All day and every day making tomorrow look like yesterday!" -Reg "All humor is derived from pain, ergo nothing in Heaven is funny" Twain "All my real skills are undervalued." -- Calvin "All reports are in! Life is now officially unfair!" - Iago "All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream..." E.A. Poe "Always yield to temptation - it may never pass your way again." - RAH "I am the Dragon. You are *NOT* the Dragon. Any questions?" Read to diffcult are sentences not the order in words with. Dinner not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)izza * Love your enemy -- it infuriates him no end. Ice cream bomb: Napolean Blownapart! If A = B and B = C, then A = C, except where void or prohibited by law. If Americans have taglines, do English have tagqueues? Earth, air, fire and water. Elementary, my dear Watson. Clive Anderson of Borg: Welcome to Whose Assimilation Is This Anyway? Close your eyes and press escape three times. I'm heavily armed, off my medication, and easily bored. Terrifying sysadmin comment: "You can do this patch with the system up." This tagline no verb. This tagline not sponsored by Pepsi in any way. This tagline not valid in NZ. This tagline not valid in New Jersey. This tagline now supports Soundblaster! Gasoline and a match make Kitty go Woof! Gates of Borg: "Anti-trust laws are irrelevant." Bullsheet - A advertising supplement in a newspaper. Is there life before death? Bungee Jumping: Suicide without the committment... Bunnies hopping backward: A receding hareline... Bunny Beer ...made with more hops. Bureaucrat's Law #2: Say what will convince, not what you believe. Burns of Borg: "Smithers, what's that irrelevant human's name again?" Busier than a Blind cat at the Braille Institute Busier than a Mormon at a wife swapping party... Busier than a flying squirrel in a wind-tunnel... Busier than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs Busier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of electric wheelchairs! Busier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of power chairs! Busier than a one legged man in an arse kicking contest Busier than a one legged man in an ass-kicking contest. Busier than a one-eyed cat watching 9 mouseholes Busier than a one-eyed cat watching two mouse holes. be known forevermore as 'THOSE WHO CHOSE CHEESE.' - F. Zappa C program run, C program crash, C programmer cry. C:>COFFEE.COM missing SysOp halted C:\> is a smiley with a shower cap and a broken nose. Caffeine Allocation Error: COFFEE.SYS missing, Programmer halted. Carpe DM - Seize the Dungeon Master! Cause of crash: Inadvertent contact with the ground. Celibacy is hereditary. Chivalry ain't dead, it's just being sued for sexual harrassment. Chocolate (n.): See Ambrosia Chocolate-coat those words. You'll eat them later. Christopher Robin Hood steals from the rich and gives to the Pooh Circular logic will only get you dizzy. This .sig is Classified. Please enter your passcode: > Rigidly defining the areas of doubt and uncertainty. Cogito Ergo Windows: I think, therefore Icon. Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage. Computer: Everything Murphy wanted and more. Computers run on smoke - it if leaks out, they stop running Confucious Say: "He who snorts Coke gets ice-cubes up his nose" Confucious Say: A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose. Confucious Say: Man Who Throw Grenade in TNT Factory Is Crispy Idiot Confucious Say: Man who Farts in Church sits in own pew. Confucious Say: Man who put foot in mouth get athlete's tounge. Confucious Say: Man who stand on toilet is high on Pot. Confucious say...man who live in glass house shower in basement. Confucious say: "Do unto others what you think is funny." Confucious say: Man who put face in punchbowl get punch in nose. Confucious say: Man who smoke pot choke on handle. Confucious say: he with no taglines is deprived Confucious say: Man should never straddle barbed wire fences. Confucious say: Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get A flat miner. Confucius Say, "Stop quoting me!" Confucius Say: Man Who Stand Behind Car Get Exhausted! Confucius Say; House without toilet is uncanny. Confucius Say; Man who eat many prunes get good run for money. Confucius Say; Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion! Confusion not only reigns, it pours Conspiracy? There's no conspiracy. Go ahead. Ask anyone..... "Corrupt" is too harsh, I prefer the term "Ethically Challenged". Could you continue to miss the point if I impaled you on it? Creative balderdash can be interesting for its own sake... Cry, "Bother!" and let loose the Poohs of war! Cry RIBBETT!!! And let slip the Frogs of War! Cross between a Vulcan and a Tribble? Fuzzy logic. Crude, immoral, vulgar, and senseless Cure for spurned lovers: broken heart surgery. Curiosity formated the cat. CyberVentriloquists...Users who can throw their voice mail. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Do Apple users get Cyderspace? Cynic: Someone who smells the flowers and looks for the casket. Cynic: a man who tells you the truth about your own motives. cheese: Milk's leap toward immortality. counterpointing the surrealism of the underlying metaphor since 1996 D.R.A.G.O.N.: Dangerous Reptile, Ask Good Ol' Noah! DEFINE: Da fing you get for breaking de law. DEJA MOO, YOU'VE MILKED THIS COW BEFORE. DEL *.* (How DARE you delete my Tribbles?) Linux: a no-Win situation Windows 2000: Just another pane in the glass DIPLOMACY: Making a point without sticking anyone with it "DM's love a hero; DM's also love a good joke. Think about it." "DM, we just found 20 bottles of potion of healing is this a sign?" DO : PRINT "Waiter, There's a bug in my..." : LOOP Don't Panic Dead bloke in a closet? Winner of 1987 Hide and Seek Award. Decaffeinated coffee? What's the POINT!? Deja 42: Haven't I seen this tagline explanation before? Deja BOO... Scared to death in a past life... Deja BooBoo: The feeling you've stolen this picnic basket before. Deja Brew: the feeling that you've had this beer before. Deja Chew: I've tasted this before. Deja Dew: The feeling that you've drunk this soda pop before. Deja Dude: The feeling you've been surfing before. Deja Flu: A feeling you are sick and tired about being sick and tired. Deja Grue: Dammit, lost the lantern AGAIN! Deja Moo - the feeling you've heard this bull before Deja Eeew - The feeling you have stepped in this before Deja Q: A very, very odd feeling that this ST/TNG episode is a re-run. Deja Voodoo: "Have I sacrificed this chicken before?" Deja Who: The feeling that you've seen the TARDIS before. Deja clue: The feeling you've solved this mystery before. Deju Glue: PostIt Notes DesCartes of Borg: Assimilato ergo cum. Despite my wild ways, deep down inside I'm just sweet and innocent. Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular. Did you accidentally format your brain this morning? Did you ever notice race car spelled backwards is racecar? Did you ever try to lipread a muppet? Did you expect mere proof to alter my opinion? Did you fall out of the tree and hit every branch on the way down? Did you get a haircut, or did you lose to a lawn mower? Did you get my memo about the squid-tossing contest? Did you hear the peacock story? No. Its a beautiful tale. Did you know 90% of all pig skins in Oz are used to hold pigs together Did you know that cheerios are really donut seeds? Did you know that clones never use mirrors? Did you know that gullible isn't in the dictionary? Did you know that most people's lives are ruled by telephone numbers? Did You Know: We Are The People Our Parents Warned Us About? Didja ever wonder: if corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil...? Didn't I meet you in some other hallucination? Didn't your mother ever tell you not to play with your food? - Zazu Die Hard: With A Snowball's Chance In Hell Die, my dear doctor? That's the last thing I shall do. Difference between a virus & Windows 95? Viruses never fail. Difference between a hero and a coward is one step sideways. Difference between genius & stupidity: Genius has limits Difficulty lies not in new ideas, but giving up the old ones. Dignity: One thing that can't be preserved in alcohol. DINNER NOT FOUND (A)bort (R)etry (P)izza Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" till you find a rock. Diplomacy: First listen to sermon, THEN eat missionary. Diplomacy: the patriotic lying for one's country. Dire Wolves are NOT cute! Discoveries are made by not following instructions ... Disk full! Can't eat another byte! DisneyLand: People trap operated by a Mouse... Disney's Law: Children under 12 must be accompanied by money. Distress: opposite of dat dress. Distressed damsels don't dig dragons! Do I have to remind you that you have the right to remain silent? Do I like my coffee black? Are there other colours? Do I LOOK like I know what I'am doing? Do I look like I would use taglines? It's easier to get forgiveness than permission Do it yourself Tagline: ______________________________________ DO NOT ADJUST YOUR MIND - the fault is with reality. Do not anger a Bard, for you are silly and would make a funny song. Do not anger a dragon; For you are crunchy and go well with Brie. Do not anger cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your computer. Do not believe all that you see is as it appears. Do not believe anything I haven't said DO NOT BEND, FOLD, STAPLE, OR IN ANY WAY MUTILATE THIS MONITOR. Do not meddle in the affairs of NT, for it is subtle and quick to anger. Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for..*POOF!* ribbet! ribbet!.. Do not microwave Silly Putty. Do not read this tagline Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out if it alive. Do not tease or feed the straight people! Do Not, I Repeat, Do _NOT_, Put A Fuse In Silly Putty. Do Rock & Roll sheep listen to Ewe2? Do smoked Salmon have warnings from the Sturgeon General? Do still life on your computer -- run WinDOZE. Do the joke. Get the laugh. Move on. Do you have a *problem* with me being paranoid? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? Do you think you can hold off a vampire with a sunlamp? Do you want a Yes/No prompt? [Y/N] Doan need no spel chekker. I'm a riter. Does a Cheshire cat drink evaporated milk? Does a chocolate fireman use a carbohydrant? Does a computer Witch cast hexidecimals? Does a kaleidoscope look normal on acid? Does a lager brewed for Easter need a lot of hops? Does a lurker peep in Microsoft Windows? Does a medical book have an appendix? Does a nuclear family glow in the dark? Does a one-legged duck swim in circles? Does a witch prefer a broom because Nature abhors a vacuum? Does a witch use a hex dump for used curses? Does an orange have appeal? Does anyone have any questions? Any answers? Anyone care for a mint? Does Bad FAT mean this disk has high cholesterol? Does killing time damage eternity? Does my family suffer from Insanity.? - No, we enjoy it..!! "Whenever Pavlov rang a bell, all the dogs attacked the nearest merangue" Does your cat fly by herself? No, I fling her. Dogs come when called. Cats have answering machines. Dogs crawl under fences, software under Windows. Don't *ever* tease a dragon about its mother. Don't anthropomorphize computers. They hate that. Don't ask me -- I was hired for my looks. Don't ask me - I'm just improvising Don't ask me - I'm making this up as I go along! Don't ask me any questions. I just might tell you the truth. Don't ask me I'm just visiting this planet Don't ask me what the score is. I'm not even sure what the game is. Don't ask me! I'm just an anthropomorphic personification. Don't attempt to adjust the dials, we are in control of your monitor. Don't be a snob. Never lie when truth is more profitable. Don't be superstitious. It's bad luck. Don't believe anything you read, especially taglines Don't bother pressing that key, there is no Esc. Don't burn our liberties to protect our symbols. Don't compute and drive; the life you save may be your own. Don't confuse an open mind with one that's vacant. Don't count your chickens before they cross the road. Don't draw fire. It irritates everyone around you. Don't even pretend to be interested in this Tagline Don't follow in my footsteps. I think I stepped in something. Don't insult the alligator till after you cross the river. Don't judge a book by its mini-series. Don't judge a person by their taglines Don't kick it if you haven't tried it. Don't knock on Death's Door. Just ring and run. He hates that. Don't lend people money. It causes amnesia. Don't let people drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance. Don't let reality screw up yor dreams! Don't let the blue smoke out! Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone. Don't like these tags? Steal your own. Don't look a GIF horse in the modem. Don't look now, but this message is over... Don't open the Windows! You let Mr. Gates in! Don't Panic. Don't panic...you have your towel, right? Don't question authority, it doesn't know either! don't read the tagline until you've finished your message!... Don't say "Look" when you mean "Please Listen." Don't speak correct English. No one will understand you. Don't start an interstellar war, it has no helpful uses. Don't sweat it - it's only ones and zeros. Don't take life seriously - won't get out alive! Don't take life too seriously. It's only temporarily. Don't take me literally. Don't think of them as pedestrians, think of them as semi-mobile speed bumps. Don't turn your PC into a toad; it just goes reboot, reboot, reboot... Don't use a long word if a diminutive one will do. Don't worry - Cthulhu LIKES your sense of humor. Don't worry -- the next message will be better. Don't you see what this means? Yes. We're going to die. DON'T YOU WISH: Just once, Silk had said, "I stole it from Polgara." Don't. You're too young to experience that much pain. --Ivanova. Don'tyoujusthatetaglinesthatdonthaveanyspaces? Door: Something a cat wants to be on the other side of. DOS = house of straw, Windows = house of twigs, Linux = house of bricks. DOS Error #666: Computer Possessed! DOS is the wound. Windows is the scab. DOS is your PC. Windows is your PC on drugs. Any Questions? Double you hard drive space : DELETE WINDOWS! Dragon slayers wanted. No experience expected. Dragons, THE ORIGINAL flying toaster! Dramatic Smiliys: Tragedy :-( Comedy :-) Surpise :-o Suspense 8-| Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing Dreams are answers to questions we haven't yet figured out how to ask. Dreams are the mind's way of going insane nightly. Dreams are true while they last. DREAMWARE: THEY send YOU $25 if you use it longer than 30 days... Drill a hole right here for secret treasure! --> X. Drilling for oil is boring. Drinking doesn't cause hangovers....waking up does! Drinking problem? I drink, get drunk, fall down. No problem. Drive nail here [ ] for new monitor! Drugs Kill! If thrown hard enough. Drunk Borg: "Rsilience in floor tile. Wan'be similated?" Dubious metrics: 10 cards = 1 decacard Dubious metrics: 10 dence = 1 decadence Dubious metrics: 10 millipedes = 1 centipede Dubious metrics: 10 monologues = 1 decalogue Dubious metrics: 10 monologues = 5 dialogues Dubious metrics: 10 rations = 1 decoration Dubious metrics: 10**-1 mates = 1 decimate Dubious metrics: 10**-12 boos = 1 picoboo Dubious metrics: 10**-12 boulevards = 1 pico-boulevard Dubious metrics: 10**12 bulls = 1 terabull Dubious metrics: 10**-12 dillies = 1 picodilly Dubious metrics: 10**12 microphones = 1 megaphone Dubious metrics: 10**12 pins = 1 terrapin Dubious metrics: 10**-15 bismol = 1 fepto bismol Dubious metrics: 10**15 coats = 1 petacoat Dubious metrics: 10**-15 fatales = 1 femtofatale Dubious metrics: 10**-18 boys = 1 atto boy Dubious metrics: 10**18 minations = 1 examination Dubious metrics: 10**-2 mentals = 1 centimental Dubious metrics: 10**21 piccolos = 1 gigolo Dubious metrics: 10**-3 ink machines = 1 millink machine Dubious metrics: 10**-3 on = 1 million Dubious metrics: 10**-5 dollars = 1 Millicent Dubious metrics: 10**6 bicycles = 2 megacycles Dubious metrics: 10**-6 fish = 1 microfiche Dubious metrics: 10**-6 scopes = 1 microscope Dubious metrics: 10**9 antics = 1 gigantic Dubious metrics: 10**-9 goats = 1 nanogoat Dubious metrics: 10**9 lows = 1 gigalow Dubious metrics: 10**9 micrometers = 1 kilometer Dubious metrics: 10**9 micrometers = 200 pentameters Dubious metrics: 10**-9 Nanettes = 1 nanoNanette Dubious metrics: 10**9 questions = 1 gigawhat Dubious metrics: 10^ -1 mates = 1 decimate Dubious metrics: 10^ -12 boos = 1 picoboo Dubious metrics: 10^ -12 boulevards = 1 pico-boulevard Dubious metrics: 10^ -12 dillies = 1 picodilly Dubious metrics: 10^ -15 bismol = 1 fepto bismol Dubious metrics: 10^ -15 fatales = 1 femtofatale Dubious metrics: 10^ -18 boys = 1 atto boy Dubious metrics: 10^ -18 knees = 1 attorney Dubious metrics: 10^ -2 mentals = 1 centimental Dubious metrics: 10^ -3 ink machines = 1 millink machine Dubious metrics: 10^ -3 on = 1 million Dubious metrics: 10^ -5 dollars = 1 Millicent Dubious metrics: 10^ -6 fish = 1 microfiche Dubious metrics: 10^ -6 scopes = 1 microscope Dubious metrics: 10^ -9 goats = 1 nanogoat Dubious metrics: 10^ -9 Nanettes = 1 nanoNanette Dubious metrics: 10^12 bulls = 1 terabull Dubious metrics: 10^12 dactyls = 1 teradactyl Dubious metrics: 10^12 microphones = 1 megaphone Dubious metrics: 10^12 pins = 1 terrapin Dubious metrics: 10^15 coats = 1 petacoat Dubious metrics: 10^15 philes = 1 petaphile Dubious metrics: 10^18 minations = 1 examination Dubious metrics: 10^18 stentials = 1 exastential Dubious metrics: 10^21 piccolos = 1 gigolo Dubious metrics: 10^3 Kowalskis = 1 Kilokowalski Dubious metrics: 10^6 bicycles = 2 megacycles Dubious metrics: 10^9 antics = 1 gigantic Dubious metrics: 10^9 lows = 1 gigalow Dubious metrics: 10^9 micrometers = 1 kilometer Dubious metrics: 10^9 micrometers = 200 pentameters Dubious metrics: 10^9 questions = 1 gigawhat Dubious metrics: 1000 Kowalskis = 1 Kilokowalski Dubious metrics: 2 bulls = 1 Pair a bull Dubious metrics: 2 homosexuals = 1 bisexual Dubious metrics: 2*10**3 millinaries = 1 binary Dubious metrics: 2*10**3 millinaries = 4 seminaries Dubious metrics: 2*10**3 mockingbirds = 2 kilo mockingbird Dubious metrics: 2*10^3 millinaries = 1 binary Dubious metrics: 2*10^3 millinaries = 4 seminaries Dubious metrics: 2*10^3 mockingbirds = 2 kilo mockingbird Dubious metrics: 3 1/3 tridents = 1 decadent Dubious metrics: 5 holocausts = 1 Pentecost Dubious metrics: billions and billions = 1 Sagan Duck Tape can fix anything... Due to Budget Constraints light at end of tunnel is off! Due to budget cuts, all clouds will be lined with zinc. Due to lack of interest, tomorrow will be cancelled. dum de do di da la le do .... ok the fat lady has sung. Dumb questions are easier to handle than dumb mistakes! Dumb v2.0: Upgrade from Stupid v1.0 DUMB: Buying water that spells NAIVE backwards. Duplicate taglines are created as a duplicate recreation. Each snowflake in an avalanche pleads not guilty. S.J. Lee Eagles may soar, but Weasels don't get sucked into jets. Early to bed, early to rise, is a sure sign the connection is broken! Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead. Earth is 98% full - please delete anyone you can. Earth is a beta site. Earth is a great funhouse without the fun. Earth- Mostly Harmless (HHGTG 2nd ed.) Earth shutting down in 5 minutes.Close files and log off. Earthlings: Send more probes. The last one was delicious! Eat any good books lately? Eat doughnuts, for they are round and all things round are good. Eat right. Exercise. Wear your seat belt. Die anyway. Eat sheep. 20,000 coyote's can't be wrong! Eeyore of Borg: Nobody wants me to assimilate them. Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks. Egg-laden rabbit who jumps off bridges: the Easter Bungee. Egyptian tourists don't die -- they go to senile. ELECTRICIAN(n): a switch doctor Electrician's breakfast - ohmlettes. - Raymond D. Love Electrocution, n.: Burning at the stake with all the modern improvements. Electrons are very, very small, but they can gang up and hurt you. Emoticon: !-( Black eye Emoticon: $-) Alex P. Keaton Emoticon: %-) User has been staring at screen for 15 hours. Emoticon: %*@:-( Hung over Emoticon: %- Drunk with laughter Emoticon: %-6 User is brain dead Emoticon: &-| Tearful Emoticon: ((((8-) Marge Simpson Emoticon: (-: User is left handed Emoticon: (:-( Unsmiley frowning Emoticon: (:-) Smiley big-face Emoticon: (:-). Man drooling Emoticon: (:\/ Sent by a duck Emoticon: (:I Egghead Emoticon: (8-)= Sent by an owl Emoticon: (8-o It's Mr. Bill! Emoticon: '-) Wink Emoticon: ):-( Unsmiley big-face Emoticon: )8-) Scuba smiley big-face Emoticon: *) Tribble Smiley Emoticon: *:o) Bozo the Clown! Emoticon: *<:-) User is wearing a Santa Claus Hat Emoticon: ,-) One eyed winking man Emoticon: .-{] One eyed pirate w/ moustache Emoticon: /:-| Mr. Spock Emoticon: :-' Smoker Emoticon: :-! foot in mouth Emoticon: :-# My lips are sealed Emoticon: :-# User wears braces Emoticon: :-#| Smiley face with bushy mustache Emoticon: :-$ Smiley face with it's mouth wired shut Emoticon: :-% Smiley banker Emoticon: :-& User is tongue tied. Emoticon: :-( Frowning smilie. Emoticon: :( Sad Emoticon: :'-( User is crying Emoticon: :-( ) you backed your car over my toe Emoticon: :--) Jamie Farr (Clinger from M*A*S*H) Emoticon: :) Happy Emoticon: :) Midget smiley Emoticon: :'-) User is so happy, s/he is crying Emoticon: :-) Your basic smiley. Emoticon: :-)( Mixed Emotion Smiley Emoticon: :-)~ User drools Emoticon: :-)=--- Man with a tie Emoticon: :-)8 Sent by gentleman (bow tie) Emoticon: :-)-8 User is a Big girl Emoticon: :-* Oops! Emoticon: :-* User just ate something sour Emoticon: :* Kisses Emoticon: :*) User is drunk Emoticon: :*> cat Emoticon: :-, "Hmmmm " Emoticon: :,( Crying Emoticon: :-/ User is skeptical Emoticon: :-: Mutant Smiley Emoticon: -::-) User is a punk rocker Emoticon: :::::::-) Insect Emoticon: :-? Sherlock Holmes with a calabash Emoticon: :-? User smokes a pipe Emoticon: :-@ User is screaming Emoticon: :-[ Pouting Emoticon: :-[ User is a Vampire Emoticon: :[ Real Downer Emoticon: :-\ Undecided smiley Emoticon: :-] Smiley blockhead Emoticon: :] Gleep Emoticon: :^) tongue in cheek Emoticon: :-` Smiley spitting out its chewing tobacco Emoticon: :-{ Mustache Emoticon: :-{ Smiley variation on a theme Emoticon: :{ What? Emoticon: :-{)} User has moustache & beard Emoticon: :-{)> User has moustache & goatee Emoticon: :-{} User wears lipstick Emoticon: :-| "Have an ordinary day" smiley Emoticon: :-| Grim Emoticon: :-|| Anger Emoticon: :-} "Thish wine tashted pretty good" Emoticon: :-} Beard - or - Wry grin smiley. Emoticon: :-~) User has a cold Emoticon: :+( Punched nose, hurt Emoticon: :-< Moustache Emoticon: :< Midget unsmiley Emoticon: :<) User is from an Ivy League school Emoticon: := | Baboon Emoticon: :-=) Older smiley with mustache Emoticon: :=) User has two noses Emoticon: :-> Hey, hey! Emoticon: :-> User just made a really biting sarcastic remark Emoticon: :> Midget smiley Emoticon: :-0 No Yelling! (Quiet Lab) Emoticon: :-1 Smiley bland face Emoticon: :-6 Smiley sticking out Tongue Emoticon: :-7 Smiley after a wry statement Emoticon: :-8( Condescending stare Emoticon: :-9 User is licking his/her lips Emoticon: :-C User is really bummed Emoticon: :C What? Emoticon: :-d Lefty smiley razzing you Emoticon: :-D User is laughing (at you!) Emoticon: :D Laughter Emoticon: :-E Bucktoothed vampire Emoticon: :-e Disappointed smiley Emoticon: :-F Bucktoothed vampire with one tooth missing Emoticon: :-I Hmm Emoticon: :-I Indifferent smiley. Emoticon: :I Hmmm... Emoticon: :-j Left smiling smiley Emoticon: :-k Beats me, looks like something, though. Emoticon: :-l Y. a. s. Emoticon: :-O Shouting. Emoticon: :-o Yawn Emoticon: :O Yelling Emoticon: :-P Nyah, nyah Emoticon: :-p Smiley sticking its tongue out (at you!) Emoticon: :-P Tongue hanging out in anticipation Emoticon: :-q Smiley trying to touch its tongue to its nose Emoticon: :-Q User is a smoker Emoticon: :-s Smiley after a BIZARRE comment Emoticon: :-S User just made an incoherent statement Emoticon: :-x "My lips are sealed" smiley Emoticon: :-x Kiss kiss Emoticon: :-Y A quiet aside Emoticon: :-z Y.a.c.s. Emoticon: ;-) Winking smiley Emoticon: @:-) User is wearing a turban Emoticon: @= User is pro-nuclear war Emoticon: [:-) User is wearing walkman Emoticon: [:-] sent by a robot Emoticon: [] Hugs Emoticon: {:-) User wears a toupee Emoticon: |-) Geordie LaForge smiley Emoticon: |-{ "Good Grief!" (Charlie Brown?) Emoticon: |~( "Someone just busted my nose" Emoticon: |-I User is asleep Emoticon: |-O User is yawning/snoring Emoticon: }:-( Toupee in an updraft Emoticon: +:-) Smiley priest Emoticon: +-:-) User is the Pope Emoticon: <:-( Disappointed Emoticon: <:-I User is a dunce Emoticon: <|-) User is Chinese Emoticon: =) Variation on a theme... Emoticon: =:-) Smiley punk-rocker Emoticon: =:-O scared me too Emoticon: =|:-)|= American Uncle Sam Smiley. Emoticon: =8-O Scared surfer dude Emoticon: >:-( Mad, annoyed Emoticon: >:-< Mad Emoticon: >:-> User just made a really devilish remark. Emoticon: >;-> Winky and devil combined. A very lewd remark Emoticon: 3:[ Mean Pet smiley Emoticon: 3:[ Mean Pet smilie Emoticon: 3:] Pet smiley Emoticon: 7:^] Ronald Regan? Emoticon: 8 :-) User is a wizard Emoticon: 8-) User wears glasses Emoticon: 8:-) Glasses on forehead Emoticon: 8:-) User is a little girl Emoticon: 8-] "wow, maaan" Emoticon: 8-| Eyes wide with surprise Emoticon: B-) User wears horn-rimmed glasses Emoticon: B:-) Sunglasses on head Emoticon: B-D "Serves you right, dummy!!" Emoticon: C=:-) User is a chef Emoticon: d8= Your pet beaver is wearing goggles and a hard hat Emoticon: E-:-) User is a Ham radio operator Emoticon: K:P User is a little kid with a propeller beanie Emoticon: -O "Omigod!!" (done after "rm -rf *" ?) Emoticon: O :-) User is an angel (at heart, at least) Emoticon: O-) User in scuba gear Emoticon: s:^D "Great! I like it!" Emoticon: X-( User just died Emoticon: :*> cat Enlightenment comes from the journey, not the destination. Equal Opportunity does NOT equal Equal Outcome. ESCHATON.SYS Found.Immanentize?(Yes/No/Quit/Fnord) Eschewing Obfuscation since 1996 Escape sequence: Distract guard. Dig tunnel. Cut through fence... Eternal Optimist: Hey, my glass is 1/100 full! Ethernet - A device for catching the Ether Bunny Etiquette - Saying "No, thank you," when you want to yell, "Gimme." ETLA Extended Three Letter Acronym Eureka! We'll send the Borg a copy of Windows! Even a blind squirrel finds a walnut now and then. Even a broken clock is right twice a day. Even worse than raining cats and dogs is hailing taxis. Ever just seem to not be able to get around to procrastinating? Ever notice you cannot read lips on a Muppet? Ever seen an antelope? They get this teeny ladder, see... Ever think it might be the USER that needs debugging? Eveready Bunny arrested, then released, then recharged! Eveready Bunny to go on trial for battery charges. Every absurdity has it's champion. Every day is the dawn of a new error. Every dogma has its day; until some karma runs over it. Every educated man is a bully in a discussion. --Beerbohm. Every exit is an entrance into something else. Every fat person has a skinny one inside. He ate it! Every nanosecond is a monent in our history. * Data Every novel should have a beginning, a muddle, and an end. Every once in a while I feel that I am at two with the universe. Every once in a while, stop and enjoy an ice cream cone. -Einstein Every once in a while, take the scenic route. Every silver lining has a cloud around it. Every Tagline's Sacred. Every Tagline's Good. Every time I have all the answers, they change questions! Every time I've built character, I've regretted it. - Calvin Everybody believes in something-I believe I'll have another drink. Everybody stand back...he's got a MAGNET!! Everyone BACKUP, he's got a magnet! Everyone else my age is an adult, whereas I am merely in disguise. Everyone is a genius. It's just that some people are too stupid to realize it. EVERYONE ON THE PREMISES IS A VEGETARIAN EXCEPT THE DOG. Everyone should stop verbing nouns. Evil has been dealt a serious blow, but will return. Evolution is God's way of issuing upgrades. Exam is a four-letter word for torture... Excellent day for putting Slinkies on an escalator. Excessive mouse activity detected. Running C:\CAT.EXE Excuse me for butting in -- I'm interrupt-driven. Excuse me, but did I say that? Doesn't sound like me Execute program: (G)un (K)nife (E)lectric Chair (H)ang (A)bort. Experiencing tagline diddiculties. ... Please stand b Experiment #5: Cats without legs are easier to bathe. Explain counter-clockwise to someone with a digital watch f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgmmng Fact: fourteen out of every ten people like chocolate. Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. Facts, though interesting, are usually quite irrelevant. Fade out already, they got the joke. - Slappy Squirrel FAILSAFE: FAIL = Ooops. SAFE = Shelter constructed for the AfterOops. Fairy tales: horror stories for children to get them used to reality Fall Not In Love, It Will Stick To Your Face Famous DM Farewells: "It hits and...hold on, I need more dice" Famous DND Quote - I disbelieve... Ok ...I run. Fastest Gun In The West: Everett DeReady Fate had tried to conceal him by naming him Smith. Fate protects fools, children and ships named Millennium Falcon. Fear is the darkroom where negatives are developed. Fear is the mind killer. Fear is the little death... Feature (n) a BUG with seniority. Feathers are so expensive now that even down is up. Feel free to misuse the above, but make sure you mention the source. Feel free to publish this TagLine. It's Stolen Feel free to rip me off at will. Everybody else does .... Feel free to steal this Tagline, the person I stole it from did... Felicity: A town inhabited by happy cats. Fer sail cheap, WINDOWS spel chekker, wurks grate! Feudalism: It's your Count that votes. Few problems cannot be solved by proper application of high explosives. File Allocation Table Corrupt. Who CAN you trust? Filk is 8-bit folk music with the parody bit set! Filth! Contamination! Pestilence! Ha Ha Ha! - Calvin Fire Congress! Let's hire a Dictator. First rule of fighting. Don't get hit. First rule of holes, if you're in one, STOP DIGGING! First shalt thou pull out the Holy Pin... Fjords give a lovely baroque feel to a continent. Flame: drive-by shooting on the Information Superhighway. Flashlight - a case for storing dead batteries... Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it, but don't swallow it. Flight 666 now boarding at gate 13. Flight 666 now boarding at gate 13. FNORD! This tagline does not exist. Fnord. Fnord. Fools and their money become popular quickly. Fools belittle what they do not understand. Cynics belittle all else. For a big surprise, try pressing ALT+F4 right now. For a bug free environment, do NOT open Windows. for a good prime call 391581*2^216193 - 1 For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first be ignored by a cat. For a new monitor, tap with a hammer. For a reply, send a self-abused, stomped aardvark to... For free warez hit For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism For every complex problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong For I'm a jolly good tagline, for I'm a jolly good tagline... For Maximum Attention, Just make a MISTAKE For sale, Parachute. Used once. Opens on impact. Small stain.